Name: Maren Schmidt
Location: Kamuela, HI
Professional Industry: Education, Media
Company: Kids Talk News
Job Title: Columnist and Workshop Presenter
WIXII-ISM™ FROM MAREN SCHMIDT:
From a former stay-at-home mom whose career has evolved over time: “I realized I could “have it all,” but not everything at the same time. It seems that new opportunities appear all the time and when you see something interesting you go for it.”
“Think about what you can let go and let it go. Write down what your ideal day would look like and take the steps to make it happen.”
PERSONAL AND PROFESSIONAL INFORMATION:
Meet our featured Wixii™, Maren Schmidt. She is in her late 50s and mother to two grown daughters. She and her husband, Mark, were married 8 years before they welcomed their first daughter into the world. She earned a B.A. in Interpersonal and Organizational Communication from the University of Arkansas at Little Rock and later earned her M.Ed from Loyola College in Maryland. She also received an Elementary Teaching Certificate from Association Montessori Internationale. She formerly founded a Montessori school in Arkansas, which continues to operate as a non-profit organization. Currently, she is a newspaper and online columnist (Kids Talk), book author, and workshop presenter on child development issues who creates content to help adults understand children. Please visit her website, MarenSchmidt.com, for more detailed information. Her husband, Mark, is a consultant and retired Walmart executive.
As 80/20 homemaker/breadwinner, she devotes about 35 hours per week to her career and would rate her job satisfaction and work-life satisfaction levels as 10! on a scale of 1-10 (10 being highest). She describes her career as extremely work-life friendly (she lives in Hawaii!). She loves helping people see how to build healthy relationships; however, she finds it challenging to deal with the constant changes in our society—technological, social, financial, and more. She says “[t]he ground is shifting beneath our feet and so much that worked for all my life doesn’t apply anymore!” Since her daughters are grown adults who live in different states, her household responsibilities are relaxed now. In a typical week, she spends about 20 hours per week cooking and less than 5 hours on cleaning and laundry.
To maintain her own well-being, she exercises, eats well, pursues hobbies, gets enough sleep, and prays/meditates on a daily basis. Weekly, she connects with loved ones and spends time with friends. She travels and enjoys a pampering nearly monthly (her husband conveniently has a private pilot license). She spends about 20 hours per month volunteering with various Montessori organizations.
WORK-LIFE MIX:
Describe any choices you have made in arriving at your current work-life mix. If applicable, in what ways did your work-life mix change after having children?
I realized I could “have it all,” but not everything at the same time.
Describe your career path to this point and any envisioned future changes.
I started my career in corporate America at Kelly Services and was very career focused. I took a 3-month maternity leave before returning to work. Shortly thereafter, I found out I was pregnant with our second daughter and decided it would suit our family best for me to stay at home and be able to support my husband’s career (now that my husband is retired, he supports my career!). Deciding to be a stay-at-home mom was a wonderful decision. It allowed me to focus on my children and family relationships. I was a stay-at-home mom for about 10 years before starting a Montessori school, which started in my den as my homeschooled daughters were joined by some neighborhood kids. I took Montessori training and started a school because I thought my daughters needed that. Starting a school, though, was not a good work-life mix. It did give my children the kind of education I wanted for them, and it helped me hone gifts I didn’t even know I had. What I learned from my years of teaching and running a school informs the work I do now, so I appreciate what I learned during those intense years. But, I held on to most responsibilities at home and at work so it was a stressful time, and, in hindsight, I think I would have been happier and less stressed if I had delegated more responsibilities and gotten more help.
My career path will change, I’m sure. It seems that new opportunities appear all the time and when you see something interesting you go for it.
My current work-life mix is possible (manageable) because of…
I work from home, have some financial independence, and have technology to keep me connected all over the world in different ways.
Describe a current “day in your life” from waketime to bedtime:
During my busy years when my daughters were 10 to 15, and I was teaching and running a school, my day looked something like this:
5:00am: Up and take a walk, put a load of laundry in the washer.
5:45am: Get breakfast ready.
6:00am: Breakfast/read paper.
6:30am: Mark leaves for work. I shower.
7:00am: Leave for school.
7:15am: Arrive school.
7:30am: Greet first children.
3:00pm: School dismisses.
3:30pm: Take daughters to afterschool lessons.
3:45pm: Return to school to do admin duties/professional reading.
5:00pm: Home with daughters. Prepare dinner with my daughters.
6:30pm: Family dinner.
7:30pm: Clean kitchen.
7:45pm: Family time.
8:30pm: Bedtime-everyone.
9:00 pm: Lights out.
During these years I had a weekly housekeeper and a weekly person to mow the lawn, jobs I had done when I was at home full-time. I’d go to the grocery store at 6 am on Saturday mornings.
My daily schedule today is quite different.
6:00am: Up. Coffee. Read email and papers.
7:30am: Breakfast.
8:30am: Write.
11:30am: Take a walk/exercise.
1:00pm: Lunch.
2:00pm: Write.
5:00pm: Take a walk. Prepare dinner.
6:00pm: Watch sunset and have dinner.
7:30pm: Family time/Read.
10:00pm: Bedtime
Today I have big chunks of time to do my own work. I have few interruptions to my plans for the day.
In my busy years I might have had interactions with 200 to 300 people a day. Now that number is probably like two or three.
Needless to say, child-rearing years can be extremely busy with dozens of items on the to-do list each and every day. As your children become more independent family life takes on a more relaxed pace.
On a daily basis…:
What kept me motivated during those busy years was a sense of responsibility to help my daughters become the people they were supposed to be; to help my husband fulfill his ambitions; to help my community be a better place. I’d wake up thinking, “How can I make things better today?”
My biggest frustration was keeping up the pace. Our schedule didn’t have a lot of give in it and if something extra got thrown into the mix, well, I’d drop a few balls or perhaps all the balls.
Today I realize that I didn’t have to do all the activities that I thought I should. Now I act more like the executive director of my life instead of the manager. If only I knew that then!
WIXII™ WISDOM:
Share your key(s) to maintaining order (“managing it all”) and any tools you highly recommend:
I maintained order with a color-coded calendar and my Franklin Day Planner. I carried that planner with me everywhere. Today, of course, it would be a smart phone. I made dentist and doctor checkups during school breaks. Also, I was an experienced cook so meal planning was not a big chore for me. We had simple meals that my daughters, even at age two, could help me prepare. From about age ten, my daughters were responsible for their own laundry. I mail ordered most of our clothes and other non-food items. Also, we had trusted service people and I never had to stay home have an appliance repaired. We tried to make sure all our chores were done so that Sunday could be focused on family activities.
In short, I used the KISS System. Keep It Simple, Sister.
What advice would you give an earlier version of yourself?
Hire out more responsibilities so that you can focus on being a better “executive.” Think about what you can let go and let it go. Write down what your ideal day would look like and take the steps to make it happen.
Is there anything else you would like to share regarding your work-life mix?
In retrospect, raising children goes quickly. Staying at home led me to discover skills, talents, and interests that I did not even know I possessed when I first started my career. I’ve been able to create my dream job, and I love what I do!
