“Do you think that it’s always best for children to have a mom who stays at home?” I asked my friend a school psychologist who has worked with hundreds if not thousands of young children and is now a stay-at-home mom of two young boys. “Not necessarily” she replied without hesitation, “sometimes the best thing a mom can do for her children is to get outside help.” She went on to explain that in her experience, the most important thing is for parents to understand their own limitations and to love their children enough to figure out how to get them what they need (developmentally and in general).
Her perspective, offered matter-of-factly and without judgment or guilt, came at a time when I was just coming to terms with the fact that I am a better wife and mom for working outside of the home. She has seen and worked with children in scenarios that I cannot even imagine, and because of this, she has witnessed that there are numerous paths to thriving children and parents (and also numerous paths to troubled children and parents). Above all, it is about letting go of guilt and finding ways to meet the needs of the children and the parents.
This week’s featured Wixii™, Trish Thomas, who has enjoyed a varied career path while raising her daughter, also gives me reassurance, “My daughter, Lydia, has also said many times that watching me work hard for what I want and engage in a job I truly love has been healthier than having a miserable stay-at-home mom (which I would surely have been!).”
Whether you have chosen to stay-at-home full time, work outside of the home full time, or any variation in between, may you find peace with your choices. Let’s resolve to let go of guilt and celebrate the fact that there are numerous paths to thriving children and parents. Join us on this journey!
